Chemistry Teacher's Quotes
This post was originally written in Chinese and published on Qzone.
This article is purely to praise Mr. Wu (because he always says “…di”, for example, “good di”, so we jokingly call the teacher “Brother Di” - a nickname for our dear chemistry teacher).
That’s right (liǎo)! (Brother Di’s countless affectionate affirmations to us!)
Electrons are extremely tiny. (A very accurate description!)
(A female classmate was fortunate enough to be called to the stage to write a chemical equation. She was a bit confused while writing, but after Brother Di’s guidance, she finally wrote it correctly.) Then, Brother Di said, “That’s right (liǎo), please sit down.” (At this time, we looked at the floor of the podium.)
I got a driver’s license back then, mainly to ride a bicycle. (Unexpectedly, the traffic laws were so comprehensive back then - you needed a license to ride a bicycle!)
That… what? (Brother Di’s classic catchphrase to help him think!)
A student was taking notes, and Brother Di suddenly said, “Don’t write, what are you writing!” (In my life, this is the first time I’ve encountered a teacher who strongly opposes students taking notes! Rare! Touching!)
One day, Brother Di came early, and my classmates and I suggested starting class a minute or two earlier. Unexpectedly…
- Teacher, let’s start class earlier.
- Since you strongly request it, then okay. (orz… worship)
It’s crushed. (Brother Di’s oral muscles pronounce the word “crushed” very accurately!)
(Reviewing multiple-choice questions) Is it “bo” or C? (In this day and age, it’s rare to pronounce B as “bo”. Brother Di is unique!)
(Talking about the order in which two substances are produced, Brother Di made an amazing analogy) It doesn’t matter whether the chicken came first or the egg came first, what’s important is that both the chicken and the egg can be eaten. (Brother Di’s original!)
Haier computers, one step in place! (We can only sigh at our ignorance!)
Brother Di couldn’t find the pointer in class, and he also couldn’t find the ruler. He asked, “Where’s the ruler?” “Is a stick okay?” a student asked. “Okay, bring it here.” (Okay, the dog-beating stick is my tribute!)
The teacher was writing at the top of the blackboard, and at this time, he specially cared and said, “Who’s on duty today? Will it affect your work?”
(Explaining a question) Brother Di: The valence of sulfur is +6. Student A: Andy Lau? (Obviously, Andy Lau also has a valence!)
(In one class, a student was stating their opinion) Speak a little slower, I haven’t reacted yet. (Unexpectedly, Brother Di usually lectures so fast, but his reaction is so slow)
(Brother Di called on people to answer questions in turn) Brother Di: What do you choose? Student A: I didn’t do it. Brother Di: You stand there, next one. Student B stood up and answered: I don’t know how to do it. Brother Di smiled slightly: Please sit down. (We all felt deep sympathy for Student A!)
(Brother Di was using the projector, he was desperately moving the paper, looking at the screen and saying) Why is it always moving? (Shocking!)
(A student finished answering a question) Brother Di: Wrong… well, it’s a little right. (There’s not only right and wrong in the world!)
(Talking about a chemistry experiment) I desperately passed carbon dioxide into the solution, I desperately passed it… (Brother Di’s passion was not over!)
(Brother Di is about to make an analogy) You go to the supermarket, you want to buy a bottle of iced red tea. (Which supermarket does Brother Di go to, that actually sells iced red tea!)
Brother Di criticized a student’s answer fiercely, and later he was a little embarrassed, smiled and said: Isn’t this to cultivate your ability to withstand blows? (Awesome!)
(Brother Di’s famous saying) Humility makes people arrogant, what’s there to be arrogant about… (A sentence worth pondering!)
(Compulsory 1, P88, question 11, a practice question) A toxic gas leak occurred accidentally at a chemical plant in a certain place. Question: Why should people be evacuated in the upwind direction? Brother Di’s answer: To avoid being covered by the toxic gas in the wind. (So vivid!)
(Talking about the stability of a substance, which will not change due to the environment, Brother Di made a small analogy) That “Tiandi No. 1” produced in Guangdong can also be drunk in Beijing!
(Made an amazing analogy) What’s the point of telling me your height when I ask you how old you are!
Today’s lecture won’t be finished, obviously it won’t be finished. (The word “obviously” is used by Brother Di with great skill!)
Petroleum tycoons, telecommunications tycoons, sanitary napkin tycoons… (Superb examples!)
(Talking about the properties of a substance) How eager it is to gain electrons! (Brother Di, a true master of language!)
(Talking about when two substances cannot coexist) Isn’t this the “two tigers” theory? Either there is tiger A, or there is tiger B, how can they coexist at the same time! (Brother Di, the originator of the “two tigers” theory!)
(Brother Di said “two tigers”, we all said “two tigers”, he saw that the situation was not good, so he said) Two tigers, two tigers, it doesn’t matter, what’s important is question six.
(A student said that a rag can…) You can, when you have time, go home and use a rag to cut marble. (What material is this rag made of, so powerful!)
Okay? Okay (dī)! (Sometimes Brother Di needs to ask and answer himself to help him think.)
How about we have a small game rule? If you can’t write the equation, you have to stand for a short class. (The game rules are indeed small!)
Don’t nitpick (cì)… (Brother Di’s line when he’s out of ideas)
Weak, soft filter paper… (Adjective master Brother Di!)
Have you seen that camellia… movie or something? (If I hadn’t seen it, I would have thought it was “The Love of the Camellia Tree”!) (Brother Di wants to give an example)
- What I eat is a steamed bun, what comes out?
- “Fart!” Several students answered the teacher in unison, and then everyone applauded in unison!
Cooking with an aluminum pot will cause dementia, and I’m almost in that state. (Brother Di finally stopped bragging!)
I will check you unexpectedly. (A bit scary)
Absorbing heat… don’t be surprised. (We’ve never been surprised!)
- Filter paper has holes, can you accept that?
- Yes.
- You guys are not simple, you can all understand! (Brother Di, it’s not simple that you can accept “we can accept that filter paper has holes”!)
(Brother Di has half white hair, Mr. Qiu has a full head of black hair, it’s obvious who is older, but Brother Di said…) You guys are so lucky in this era. We didn’t have toys to play with in our era, let alone Mr. Qiu’s era. (Mr. Qiu has something to say!)
If you put 1g of salt, it’s salt water, if you put 2g of salt, it’s also salt water. Right? If you put a piece of bone, it’s bone soup; if you put two pieces of bone, it’s still bone soup! (Awesome analogy!)
Oxygen takes advantage of the weakness, it’s been waiting for it! (How vivid!)
The wicked person files a complaint first, the wicked person always has a reason. (The truth summarized by Brother Di!)
Mobile phones can actually access the internet? (When he said this, his mouth was wide open!)
Who is the most majestic? Just look at me and you’ll know. (After all, Brother Di is 1.8 meters tall, he has the capital to say that!)
Question 4 is a little difficult. (From then on, sentences with “little” as a modifier became popular!)
(Often sighs in class) Students, ah, students, ah.
6.0 only grams. (Isn’t that 6.0gg! Brother Di, talented!)
Don’t do the following questions at all! (Is it wrong to do the questions ahead of time?! What is Brother Di up to?)
(Talking about the solution to a question) Obviously, this road is blocked, we can only find another way. (Like chopping wood!)
Copper ions killed the hydroxide ions. (Copper ions are so bad!)
You must do things correctly first, and then do the right things. (Brother Di’s life summary, worthy of our deep thought!)
(A shocking example. Mr. Qiu is our beloved homeroom teacher) Mr. Qiu drank a few bottles of beer and burped violently.
Undeniable di. (Brother Di uses idioms with ease!)
(Joking with my deskmate in private) Back then, Brother Di was handsome and safe and sound!
I said to my deskmate: Chemistry is the emotional medium between you and Brother Di. (Chemistry instantly became a matchmaker!)
A reducing agent has reducing properties, a strongman has strong properties. (Good analogy!)
Confused, confused. (A deep tone!)
To get rid of CO2, Ca(OH)2 is powerless. (Calcium hydroxide, in Brother Di’s eyes, has vitality!)
After a student answered a question, Brother Di commented: It’s like a donkey’s head doesn’t match a horse’s mouth. (Not only is there “a cow’s head doesn’t match a horse’s mouth”, but also “a donkey’s head doesn’t match a horse’s mouth”! It really exists, if you don’t believe me, go search it on Baidu)
Brother Di was working on a PPT, and found that a line of text was missing from the slide. He copied the missing line of text from the previous slide, pasted it, and said: Amazing, right. (Yes, Brother Di, you are amazing! You even know how to copy!)
(Brother Di called on a student) “You say, I’ll give you a chance” (Making us eager to answer questions!)
Students, ah! (Brother Di was too affectionate, and made a painful sound!)
Pure, who doesn’t like pure? (Brother Di, well done! You spoke the voice of us men!)
What’s the use of CaCO3? There’s a lot of it on the mountains! (Okay, I’ll remember this common sense from now on!)
As a teacher, I peddle knowledge and culture. (Making knowledge and culture seem like the instant noodles that were peddled in the Yuyan dormitory a few years ago!)
(A student answered what the valences of sulfur are, and when he mentioned positive two, Brother Di made a big bet!) Brother Di said: Does sulfur have a positive two valence? If you find it, I’ll treat you to lunch in the cafeteria… free soup. (How generous Brother Di is!)
The problem is big! (That’s called passion!)
Is it xǔe white or xǐe white, is it xǔe or xǐe? (Brother Di’s attitude towards Chinese pronunciation is perfection!)
(After PE class, chemistry class followed, and Brother Di was about to make an analogy)
- This student, you use paper to wipe your sweat. Another student: Teacher, then what do you use to wipe after eating? Brother Di: I never wipe. (With a slight smile)
Soda ash is alkaline, not that the alkalinity is very pure. (A great explanation!)
My build is very majestic, very strong. (Brother Di is actually very self-satisfied sometimes.)
(The oil in the Yuyan cafeteria has always been famous, and Brother Di also has a wonderful description) Today’s soup in the cafeteria is a sparse winter melon soup, and the layer of oil on top. (Sighing with lingering interest)
(To be continued next year)